Bittersweet Tears
On Monday, I went to my son’s grade 8 graduation. It was bittersweet.
While everyone clapped as each graduate accepted his or her certificate, I was sitting quietly in the back row, hiding my tears behind big sunglasses.
See, my son was never supposed to make it this far. When he was 10, he was diagnosed with a serious and degenerative form of muscular dystrophy that causes every every muscle in his body to slowly deteriorate over time.
I can hear the doctor’s voice like it was yesterday: “He’ll be in a wheelchair by 10.” (True). “His lungs and heart will weaken.” (True). “He’ll lose the use of his arms too.” (True). “He’ll be gone by the time he’s 14.” (Untrue).
In our family, we mark each milestones by taking little steps, not big ones. Because big ones are too far into the future, too uncertain, too much to risk.
Our next step, our next milestone, is to see him graduate from high school.
I’ve learned to not just live for today, but to live for the moment. It’s the only way to live, really. There’s richness in the now, and no one can take that away from me. The present is truly all any of us has.
Love your family, be with them in the moment. Be grateful, really grateful, for what you have. Voice it out loud. Some people think a grade 8 graduation is a silly thing. But I’m thankful. It provided a rare opportunity for me to see my son smile, and to feel thankful for all things possible.
From my family to yours, have a wonderful Canada Day.
karen, neil and tristan.
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June 30th, 2010 at 8:56 pm
Karen, Thank you for sharing your story. Blessings to all of you.
Wendy
June 30th, 2010 at 11:00 pm
I am so very, very happy for you and your family Karen! The little things somehow are often the larger things in life…. cherish every moment. Family is everything. Love Dan
July 1st, 2010 at 7:28 am
Love and blessings to all of you. Your family has been a great example of how to
persevere and enjoy life since the day we met.
Barry, Tracy and Rob
July 1st, 2010 at 7:32 am
Congratulations to Tristan.
I fully believe in what you say about family…sadly we do forget at times how precious each day with them is. Enjoy Canada Day with whom ever you are blessed to be with.
July 1st, 2010 at 9:38 am
Hi Karen – thank you for sharing this blog with us. A close friend of mine has muscular dystrophy and, like your son, is in a wheelchair with weakened heart and lungs and limited use of her arms. Congratulations to your son on his eighth grade graduation! Looking forward to the blog that shares his high school graduation with us.
July 1st, 2010 at 9:53 am
Congratulations Tristan! Off to Parkland next. Have a great summer!
Beverly, Tyler and Josh
July 1st, 2010 at 5:13 pm
Hi Karen,
I took a course at Shoreline through you. Life changing. I work for School District #61.
Great story, I believe in prayer and will be praying for a miracle for your very handsome son.
Hang in there and stay positive.
Jen
July 1st, 2010 at 8:51 pm
Thanks for sharing with us Karen. You are an example and have given me a reminder of what I am greatful for. My family is everything. xo to you and your family.
July 2nd, 2010 at 9:18 am
Hi Karen,
Congratulations to Tristan and to you Karen!
Thank you for sharing and thank you for being such a great example of living in the moment and making sure we take the time to cherish the things that are most important! I appreciated your comment about making sure we say it out loud, the spoken word is so important!
God Bless,
Kelly
July 2nd, 2010 at 4:03 pm
Karen,
You are such an inspiration to me and to many. I am working on being in the moment more and more every day! God Bless! Loretta
July 6th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
I think that that is amazing! I imagine it would be easy to focus on the negative aspects of his condition and miss out on the beauty of life. Staying positive is key in many situations. You are truly an inspiration in all aspects of your life. I wish you all a happy and healthy summer!!
Talk to you soon
Tess